New Blood
by Zachosis
Summary: A human is suddenly sent to Equestria during a hike, and he is just as confused as the residents of this new land. As the days go by in this new world, he begins to think that this isn't a curse, but a blessing. (Redo of That's No Pony. Hopefully it will be better.) I don't own MLP or any of its characters.
1. Chapter 1

_Yeah, I'm rebooting That's No Pony. Have a problem? Yeah... You probably do... But at the moment, I can't help but think of how shitty the first one was. Don't worry, it will have the same storyline for the most part. Im just going to make it *clears throat* better._

oooooooooo

**Chapter One: Hike**

The crisp mountain air filled the lungs of the young man as he opened his window. He took a few seconds to admire the gorgeous evergreen trees that surrounded his house on all sides, and the glorious mountain range a few miles away, with snowy peaks towering in the sky. Several birds chirping and wind blowing away the thin layer of snow that had formed last night was all he could hear. He closed the window and threw on his plush, red robe, covering up the markings on his body.

He walked out of his room and into the modern looking hallway, decorated with millions of dollars worth of precious paintings and sculptures. He walked to the staircase, making a half-circular path down to the large area below. He looked over the railing and down at his beautiful home. The large rug in the colors of his country's flag stood out greatly amongst the dark blue couches and dark red carpeted floor with darker red shapes all over it. The windows took up the entire two walls of the corner that made up the living area, stretching to be at least twenty five feet night and letting in natural light.

He walked down the stairs, lightly holding on to the railing. His feet sunk deeply into the soft white carpet of each step, making him feel like his feet were in a featherbed. This was why he didn't bother to wear shoes or even socks when he was home alone. The carpet was so luxurious that he didn't want anything to obstruct contact between his calloused feet and the soft fibers. He got down to the black, polished stone floor and walked over to his kitchen. He opened up one of the dark wood cabinets and grabbed a small plate. He set it down on the black granite counter and went over to the metal freezer and pulled out a box of waffles. He threw two of them into the toaster and put the box back into the freezer.

After the loud ding, he slathered butter and poured syrup onto them, eating them right there at the counter. He put the plate and fork into the sink and went back upstairs. He ran into his room and put on an olive drab t-shirt and grabbed his prized possession, a hatchet. Not just any hatchet, his hatchet. It was about a foot and a half long, with a reinforced wooden handle and a large blade, with the cutting edge about six inches long. The handle had many ornate decorations, making it look fancy and scary. He grabbed it and its holster and left the room, wearing only the shirt and his boxers.

He went into his room that he simply called his "armory", and opened the door. Inside, he kept all of the things that would make him look menacing locked away. On one wall, he had many replica firearms with orange tips on the end, and a whole shelf full of different camouflage uniforms and gear. He grabbed a woodland camouflage pair of pants, a black zip up fleece, and a hydration backpack. He slipped on the pants, putting a belt with a holster on it through the loops. He mounted his hatchet holster on the belt as well, sliding in the menacing weapon.

On another wall, he kept the real thing. Several rifles, shotguns, and even a military assault rifle stood on their racks. Normally, in public, he only carried around a small snub nose revolver, but now, in his own land, he could carry whatever he wanted. He grabbed a sleek, black, long revolver from the small shelf that held his pistols. He made sure the sights were okay, and set the revolver down on the small table in the middle of the room. He stuffed a couple of extra speed reloaders, all full with six .357 caliber shots each, in his pants pockets. He counted how much ammo had decided to get.

'_Okay, thirty six rounds. If I'm attacked, I should have enough to put someone or something down and more._'

He went down to the refrigerator and pulled out several bottles of colorful energy drinks. He went back upstairs, opening the black hydration pack and carefully pouring the orange energy drink in bottle by bottle. Eventually, it got pretty heavy and he threw the empty bottles into the trash can in the corner. He made sure he had whatever he needed, and slung the pack onto his back. He put the revolver in his holster and laced on a pair of tan combat boots.

He went downstairs, grabbing his keys and putting them in his other pants pocket, which he buttoned up, making sure they wouldn't fall out. He put on his black aviator shades and his favorite tan scarf, which looked strongly of a military scarf. He grabbed his phone, a pair of headphones, and went out the door. He jogged past the shrubs and hedges in his front yard and walked across the vast lawn and towards the gate. He looked back at his home, admiring the huge red and white futuristic structure. His sports car stood in the driveway, accompanied by a large 4x4 truck. All of these nice things weren't exactly his style, but they were gifts, so he accepted them with joy.

He opened the iron gate in the tall electric fence and walked into the evergreen forest, walking along the same path that he had been through before. There were hardly any fallen trees, for evergreens didn't drop them in Autumn. It snowed quite early, but he didn't mind. The cold was almost nothing to him. He walked along the small path for quite a while, but at one point, he found another trail.

'_Hm. I haven't ever been down here. Was this even here before?_'

He shrugged it off and decided to go down that trail.

oooooooooo

After what seemed like hours, he finally grew tired and sat down on a fallen tree. He wiped his sweat off with his scarf and took out his phone. He was a solid four miles from his house.

'_Hm. Maybe I should go back_.'

He got up and began to walk in the other direction, back the way he came. At least he thought so. He began to notice small changes.

'_That rock wasn't there when I came this way, or was it? What about that rotten tree?_'

He stopped and began to look around.

'_Huh. I don't remember this. Oh well, that's why they have technology_.'

He took out his phone again and started to get a route back to his house, when suddenly, the screen went black.

"Oh, come on! Not now! Dammit!" He said aloud.

He tried turning it on multiple times, but to no avail. Suddenly, he heard laughing. Not really laughing, but more of a chuckle. He looked around, suddenly in alert mode. The laughing continued.

"That's not funny, man!" He yelled.

The laughing continued. He began to notice that he couldn't pinpoint exactly where it was coming from. It seemed to just come out of thin air. Everywhere he turned, he heard it in a different spot. It was like trying to find a watch that was going off and was buried under tons of dirty clothes. The chuckling went on, getting louder and louder. He drew his gun.

"I swear to Kaeva I'll shoot you if you don't identify yourself!"

He pointed his gun around, through the trees and up at the branches.

"I think you will do just fine."

The voice came from his phone. He looked at it, and something began to flicker on it. Soon, the whole screen lit up and a silhouette formed in the center. It had the body of a snake and two small wings. It had disproportionate arms, and the head had two different horns. He put his face closer to the screen.

"What the fu-"

"BOO!"

A face literally shot out of his phone, and he dropped it, falling backwards. He never hit the ground. All he heard was the laughing getting distant as the leaves fell from under him and he was thrown into a black void.


	2. Chapter 2

_So, I feel like that first chap was pretty good. Agreed?_

ooooooooooo

**Chapter Two**

The fear of what he might hit was scaring the young man into almost crying. He was suddenly enveloped in light from behind him. He tried to turn around, and he saw a small dot of light. It grew bigger and bigger until it was blinding. He put his arms up in front of his face, awaiting his death.

But it never came.

He opened his eyes just in time for a ledge to come directly at his face. His face connected directly with the grass and he fell over the edge. His elbow hit some solid dirt, and his foot caught on something. With his foot caught, his upper body swung down and his back hit the face of this dirt cliff. His mouth opened as if to scream in pain, but the force of the blow to his back knocked the wind from him. Now he was just dangling by a root.

When he looked down, he couldn't see the ground. It was covered by the darkness of night, with the moonlight only illuminating a nearby body of water. Of course it didn't help that he still had his sunglasses on. This realization that he was high up in the air made him inhale deeply, getting his breath back faster than he expected. He let his arms dangle for a few seconds while he thought of a way to get to a safe area. The root that his foot snagged on began to loosen and give way. He looked around for another thing to grab on to. He saw a thick root jutting outwards, about five feet from his head.

He could swing, but it would break the root holding him. In his panic, it was the only thing he could think of. He started to move his torso and arms to build up momentum. When he thought he had enough, the root broke as if on cue and he fell down towards the larger root. He barely got a grip on it with one arm. After he calmed down now that he was the decider of his own fate, he looked for more roots to climb up. He grabbed a sturdy root and lifted himself up, moving his legs around trying to help himself up.

He then grabbed another root, and another, and another. Soon, he could feel grass where he reached, so he hooked his foot on to a root and pushed himself up with all his might. He scrambled for something to grab, and got a big handful of grass and dirt. With great effort, he got his upper body onto the flat, grassy area. In his effort, he heard a pop from his knee and felt a great deal of pain. He clenched his teeth and growled at the sudden pain, but persevered. He lifted his legs up and rolled away from the side. He stood up and immediately let out the contents of his stomach. The half digested waffles were still in chunks and he could smell the syrup. He gagged at the sight, but he didn't have anything left to throw up.

He took many short, frantic breaths, but slowly eased into slow, steady breaths. He removed his glasses and folded them up in his pocket. He closed his eyes and breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth.

'_Whew. I'm alive. I'm really alive_.'

He looked at his knee, which he was pretty sure just got dislocated. It seemed to be fine, but it was still extremely sore.

'_Damn it. I guess the rehabilitation guy won't see me for a while_.'

He made sure he had his equipment around his belt, and it was all accounted for. Everything but his phone. He dropped it before he "fell" into this place. The vomiting made his stomach churn for something to digest.

'_Alright, where can I find help?_'

He looked around, seeing close to nothing in the pitch blackness. Everything was black, or barely visible in the dim moonlight. He followed a path that led away from the edge of the cliff. Bushes poked and scratched him, but he couldn't have cared less. The long grass was almost up to his knees. Stumbling around in the darkness, he tripped over something that wasn't a root or rock. He barely put his hands in front of him in time to catch himself.

He could tell immediately that it was concrete. It seemed freshly done, because it was smooth, but grainy. He looked up and saw a wider range of things, because there were now no longer bushes to obstruct his view. He now saw a small light in the distance. It was in the shape of several squares and rectangles, so it was in a building. He fast walked towards it, not wanting to make any sound, and to keep his knee from hurting any more than it did. He had no idea if these people were hostile or not.

He wanted to observe these people and at least see what language they spoke so he could understand what country he was in. He ran across the concrete top, aware that it was getting increasingly similar to an airfield. He ran up to the blue building, and looked up to the window where the light was coming from. He heard muffled voices, but couldn't make out the language.

'_I guess it's finally time that I get to do some Splinter Cell shit_.'

He jumped at the wall, pushing off with one foot upwards so he could grab on to the next ledge. His fingers already felt like they were about to give out, but he could hear their voices more clearly now.

"Well, Soarin, you ready to lay down the whip tomorrow?"

"I sure am. Wait until we see the look on the cadet's faces."

Just as he heard laughing, his fingers gave out and he fell to the ground. His body made a lot of noise on the gravel, and his foot had clipped some kind of stack of metal items. They fell over, almost right on top of him. He looked up just as a yellow face and flaming hair looked his way. He got up and ran immediately.

"Hey! Stop!" The voice said from behind him.

He ran into the large bushes and nestled himself into one of them when he thought he was far enough. The voice didn't seem to follow him. He slowed his already heavy breathing and took another hard listen. He heard nothing.

'_So they speak English, but what the hell was that thing?_'

He took a few deep breaths and decided that it was best if he didn't go back there and risk getting hurt or killed.

'_It's not so bad. I've slept outside before. It'll be like camping_.' He said, trying to reassure himself.

He took off the hydration pack, which was still full of the fruit flavored energy drink, and set it on the ground under the bush. He lay his a head on it and took off his belt. He lay it in the bush, concealed from anyone who might sneak up and try to take his stuff.

"Sweet dreams and don't die." He said to himself.

ooooooooooo

When the light shone in his eyes, he awoke just like he would any other day. But just as he began to stretch and his head hit the leaves of the bush, he remembered what happened. He frantically grabbed his gear and put it all back on. He figured it might be less easy to spot him if his brightly colored hair wasn't showing, so he wrapped his head up in his large scarf, leaving a slot for his eyes. When he stood up, he realized that the area he was in was actually quite pretty in the light. But he didn't dare keep his head up another second. The bushes were only up to his neck at the most. A few small trees were scattered, but not enough to keep him concealed without him helping.

He walked back in the direction that the building was at, just to scope out who he was dealing with. He ducked low to the ground to avoid being spotted. Even if he was wearing camouflage, the pattern he was wearing was too dark compared to the bright green grass and bushes. As he crawled, he would hear horns go off and laughs the closer he got. He grew more cautious as he went, getting lower to the ground by the second. Pretty soon, he was army crawling, writhing like a snake towards the airfield that he was at earlier.

He began to see the tops of the hangars and other buildings, but also something else. A small disk, followed by a flying creature. It looked like a horse with minor differences, including a rainbow mane and tail, but it was _flying_ in his direction. He reacted fast and rolled underneath a nearby bush to conceal himself. When it passed directly overhead, he took a look at it. It was definitely equine, but it had _wings_.

'_What kind of fungus did my face land in_.'

He continued his crawl towards the runway, occasionally stopping and keeping still under the shadows of the bushes. It wasn't much longer until he found a good spot to look at his probable enemies. He definitely didn't hallucinate. There were dozens of them, all in different sizes and colors, all in line. A small machine flung disks out, and a pegasus-which he presumed they were, based on his knowledge of Greek mythology- would chase after it.

The same yellow and orange one that he saw in the window was blowing a whistle and yelling out names, and the disks would be flung out in different directions. There seemed to be more being flung the opposite direction from him, so he wasn't in any real danger of being spotted. The group of bushes he was in wasn't exactly good cover from the front, but it would still take a sharp eye to see him. Suddenly, as he was watching the process of this training exercise, something made a thud behind him. Something rolled next to his torso and fell onto his forearm. It was one of the disks.

"Oh shoot." A voice said from above him.

He rolled to the side and crawled as fast as he could away from the disk. He then watched as the same pegasus with the rainbow mane and tail looked down and tried to crawl under the bushes. Her ears perked up when she saw the disk, and she went for it. He got down behind the base of the bush, the long grass tickling his stubble covered chin. When she got the disk, she crawled out the opposite way.

The young man let out the breath he was holding, and relaxed. But when he moved his leg, his boot hit apt he base of another bush in the cluster, making the entire limb rustle.

"Huh?"

The cyan blue face of the pegasus bent down and looked under the bushes, and when she saw him, sitting there with nothing but his eyes showing, her eyes went wide. He had to act fast before she could alert the others. He crawled like a lizard out, faster than he ever crawled before. She took off, and he was barely too late. She flew towards the group, and he heard her shouting. He decided not to give them the pleasure of taking him down, so he threw his hands up when they all looked over towards him.

"Don't move!" The yellow and orange pegasus shouted.

"I'm not fucking moving!" He yelled back.

Soon, multiple pegasi were hovering around him.

"Take off the mask!" She yelled, now joining the pegasi.

He complied, and lowered the scarf wrapped around his head, keeping it loose around his neck.

"Are y'all just gonna stare or are ya gonna do something?" He said.

Suddenly, he felt something hit the side of his head extremely hard. It wasn't enough to knock him out, but it knocked him down. He was then swarmed, and the next thing he knew, he was being carried, dazed and confused. He began to fade in and out of consciousness from the blow to the head. He was brought to a building, still being swarmed by pegasi with confused and curious faces, just trying to get a look at him. Everything went dark again. When he opened his eyes, he was brought through a door, and set on a chair. He felt his arms and legs get tied up rather tightly. Then it went dark again.

oooooooooo

The human groaned in pain at the splitting headache that was now tormenting him.

"Are you finally awake?"

He looked up to see the yellow pegasus spitting behind a desk, with her legs up and her front legs folded behind her head. She had sunglasses on, and the sunlight reflected off of them and into his eyes. He moved his head to the side so they wouldn't be blinding him. Upon doing this, he saw multiple posters of pegasi in yellow and blue uniforms that said "Wonderbolts."

"Hmm. It's been only half an hour, but I didn't think Rainbow Dash hit you that hard."

"Where the hell am I?"

"Wonderbolts Academy. What are you?"

"I'm... human. Why did she hit me?"

"Hm, maybe because you almost attacked her."

"What? No, no. I wasn't going to hurt her."

"Yeah, I don't really trust you at the moment, which is why we took away your stuff. Look, I don't know who you are, and you don't know who I am, so let's introduce ourselves. I'm Spitfire, captain of the Wonderbolts. And you are?"

"Zacoviaxé Jasidek Vaiebakaer of Zacolia, the country name is just a coincidence."

"Wait, what?"

"I'm from Zacol-"

"No, your name. What did you say?"

"Zacoviaxé Jasidek Vaiebakaer."

"Zacoviax-" She said, trying to sound it out.

"Just call me Zac."

"Alright, Zac. We have no idea if you are dangerous or not, so we tied you up just in case."

"I'll only kill if I'm attacked."

"Rainbow Dash attacked you..."

"Well, she was acting out of fear. I can forgive that. I just wish she didn't hit me so damn hard." He said, starting to move his hands around behind his back.

"I'm not convinced that easily. I'm going to have to contact Princess Celestia to see what we should do with you."

"Sure. Whatever you need to do. Just don't get me killed. I prefer to be very much alive."

"I know, bud. Just get comfy." She said, talking like a principal of an elementary school.

She took out a piece of paper and grabbed a pen in her mouth, writing on the paper. She looked up at him a few times, then back down to the paper. When she was done, she rolled it up and walked out for a few seconds. Zac played around with the knot a little more, and realized that it wasn't a difficult knot to untie. He loosened the ties a little bit and stopped when he heard the door open again.

"Now we wait." She said, sitting down back at her desk.

They sat there in an awkward silence, saying nothing. Spitfire kept her eyes straight on him, keeping an eyebrow raised as she observed his features.

"Can... Can you stop staring at me?"

"Nope. I can do whatever I want while you're tied up, so get used to it."

"Just don't rape me."

"What? No! Gross."

"Good-"

He revealed his newly untied hands.

"-because I was gonna fight back if you did."

She got up in alarm, but he put his hands up to stop her.

"Hey, I wouldn't risk attacking you with a whole fleet of your buddies outside, waiting to beat me up."

A letter appeared and dropped to her desk. She opened it, keeping an eye on Zac.

"You're going to Canterlot, Zac. It seems that Princess Celestia would like to study you further. Don't worry, she won't cut you open. Oh, here's your stuff."

She lifted up his belt and tossed it to him. He caught it and untied his feet.

"Thanks. When does it say-"

He suddenly disappeared in a split second, and Spitfire chuckled.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Zac fell from the air, still blinded by the flash that just enveloped him. He hit his face pretty hard on a carpeted floor, but it still hurt.

"Ow! Why?"

"Hello, creature." A soothing, motherly voice said.

"Hi? I guess?"

He rubbed his eyes and his vision came back in a few seconds. When it did, he looked around. He was on a red carpet, and the rest of the floors were white marble. Giant columns and stained glass murals were all over the walls. The ceiling was high above his head by at least fifty feet.

"Human."

He turned to the side to see a larger pony, with wings, but also a horn. Her mane and tail flowed in an otherworldly way, and she stood taller than any of the other ones he had seen. Two white ponies in golden armor were at her sides with straight faces.

"Hello. Princess Celestia I presume?"

"That would be right. Zac I presume?"

"Yeppers."

"I got a letter from Spitfire a few minutes ago, and I must say, I have never heard of or seen a human before. Where are you from, Zac?"

"A planet called Earth."

"Interesting. Come closer."

He walked in her direction, stopping at the edge of the stairs.

"No need to be shy with me, child. Closer." Princess Celestia said.

"Child? I'm twenty one."

"I am thousands of years old. Not to be rude, but you are a child compared to me."

Zac shrugged and started walking up the stairs as if he was hurt.

"Are you injured?"

"Yeah, kinda. Sports accident. I'm fine."

When he got to the top, he bowed in respect.

"You have no need to bow, I just wish to know who and what you are."

Zac got up and stretched the corner of his mouth in a stupid expression.

"Well, my full name is Zacoviaxé Jasidek Vaiébakaer. I am a human from Earth, more specifically a little country that no one cares about called Zacolia. I am a part of the Zacolian Royal Family, being the middle child of the King."

"Royalty? I don't wish to be ride, but you don't exactly wear the proper attire for me to believe that you are royalty."

"Despite my position, I'm kind of a 'rebellious prince' or however the cliché goes."

"Ah, I shall see to it that you are treated with the finest care that Canterlot has to offer. I'm just going to need a memory of the location. It will be ready soon."

Her horn touched his head and he felt as if his mind was being raped, but it was over in a second.

"I will try to find a way back to your home as soon as I can. In the meantime, follow my sister, Luna, to where you will be staying."

Her wing extended towards the door and a dark blue alicorn with a flowing blue mane, sparkling like the night sky, was waiting and smiling. He slowly stepped down from the steps and limped towards Luna. He gave her a smile as she turned around to lead him to wherever he was being taken.

"Good evening." He said.

"And to you as well." She replied, still walking forward.

She led him to a room where the door was open and stopped outside the door.

"Here. Where you will stay until this has all been sorted out." She said, pointing with a hoof.

"Do you just have a room always open for whatever weird creature pops in?"

"This is Equestria. Hospitality is a strong aspect."

"Ah, great. Well, thank you, Princess."

"Hold your thanks, you may not be here for very long."

With that, the door closed. Leaving Zac to himself. Luna walked back to the throne room where her sister was. Instead of working on the portal, she found her staring straight ahead with a look of shock.

"Sister, what is the matter?"

"When I gained his memories, I saw things that I wish I hadn't seen. There was blood and death and and fighting..."

Luna walked up to her sister, and their horns touched. Luna's mind was filled with the memories of the human. She was confused at the languages that she didn't know and the sounds of certain things, but it was clear what these memories were.

"Oh my. Sister, this creature..."

"He is dangerous. I think we should give him a lesson on peace and friendship before we send him back."

oooooooooo

The door to the room opened and both of the royal sisters walked through. Zac was pacing back and forth inside, still confused.

"Hello, Zac. How has your stay been?"

"Those whole two minutes of being alone were just dandy." He said like a smartass.

The sisters frowned.

"Nawbutreally, thanks."

"Oh, no need to thank us. This is our treat."

"So, am I going home?"

The sisters looked at each other with worry and doubt.

"There has been a slight delay. You will need to stay in Equestria for a bit longer." Celestia said.

Zac's hand went to his gun, but he didn't pull it out.

"You can't keep me prisoner here..."

"Thou mustn't be alarmed. 'Tis but a favor."

"The only favor I need is to be back home."

"Trust us, you will not regret what we are about to do with you." Luna said, approaching him.

"Don't rape me! I want to stay pure!"

Celestia's horn glowed and was pointed at him. Before he knew it, he was blinded yet again.

oooooooooo

He was suddenly falling again, but from a higher altitude. He didn't even get a chance to look down before his chin hit a wooden sign and nearly broke his back on the ground. He got the wind knocked out of him and slowly turned over on his stomach, his legs folding without control. He was on the ground for a few seconds, getting his breath back before he heard a door open.

When he finally got up, a purple unicorn came out the door. Her eyes widened past their already huge state and went up to him without hesitation.

"Are you okay?" She asked, trying to help him up.

"I'm fine."

"Come inside."

She led him inside and pushed him down onto the grand velvet chair in the corner.

"Just stand still." She said, zooming off up the stairs.

She came back as soon as she went, and she had multiple instruments, some that Zac hadn't ever seen before.

"Sorry if this hurts."

She jabbed a syringe in his neck, extracting a large amount of his precious life fluid.

"Ow! Why in the neck?! Why at all?!"

"Sorry, but I've never seen something of your species and there is tons of research about you that must be done."

"At least tell me that before you dagger me in the jugular."

She didn't even make eye contact with him, she would just measure, draw, and write notes. She blinded him with a flash photo of his eye, making his vision cut out for a few seconds before returning when he rubbed his eyes.

"What the hell?"

"It's all in the name of research! Here, talk into this recorder."

She held out a recording device that was already recording.

"Uhh, when can this be over?"

"Great!"

She stopped the recording and went back to her notes.

"Answer my question." He said as she came at him with another syringe.

"What question?"

"When can we be done? I have only been here for a minute and you're already bombarding me like I'm some kind of science experiment. I'm not an animal."

She stopped what she was doing entirely.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm always blinded by my curiosity. What's your name?"

"Zac."

"Zac? Odd. I'm Twilight Sparkle."

"And you called my name odd?"

"Well, yes."

He straight-faced her hard, but then shrugged.

"Well, your name must be in another language or something. That would explain your accent."

"Well, my full name in my language means nothing. It's just a name. And I can do an American accent if you want me to."

"American? Can't you just speak in the accent I'm speaking in?"

"Your accent is American. You know what? Never mind. How is this?"

He replicated her accent almost perfectly.

"Much better. No offense, but I was straining to understand you in your natural accent."

"Nah, I understand."

"Alright, so. Now that we got the physical observations out of the way, how about I just ask some questions?"

Zac shrugged and again rubbed the spot on his neck where she jabbed him with the giant needle.

"Sure."

He got more comfortable in his seat and she picked her notepad back up.

"Well, science is still on my mind. How many of your species exists?"

"Well, there are over seven billion humans on my planet, Earth. People really need to stop spitting out babies."

"Seven billion? Wow. Oh, and about the babies, how does your species reproduce?"

"Same way as most other species. Sperm and egg."

"How exactly do you mate?"

"Why do I get the vibe that this is a world of nothing but sexual thoughts? We humans mate the same way you do."

"Well, it can't be all the same." Twilight said.

"Do you want a friggin demonstration?" He asked rhetorically.

She blushed and tried to hide it behind her notepad. He sighed and put his hands up. He made a circle with his thumb and index finger and stuck his other finger through it, making a dumb smile and raising his eyebrows.

"Is that enough?"

"For now."

He stood up and leaned back, getting a few cracks from his back. He straigtened his scarf and patred his body down for his sunglasses. He shoved his hands in his pockets and found the pair of sleek aviators. At least they used to be. One of the lenses was completely cracked in half and the frame was bent.

"Gosh dammit." He said under his breath.

He tried to bend the frame back into place but broke it in half in the process.

"Uhh, where's your trash can?"

"Oh, I'll take those." She said.

His broken sunglasses levitated out of his hand and to her. She set them in the drawer with her notepad and closed it. Afterwards, she sat down on the small couch and just stared at him. His eyes looked everywhere in the room but her.

"Uh... You're freaking me out. You haven't even told me where I am."

"Oh, sorry. You are in Ponyville, Equestria. This is the library, and my home. My assistant Spike is gone at Rarity's Boutique to help her."

"Yeah, I've only had contact with ponies for an hour or so. Everything is happening way too fast for my liking."

"Well, I guess we should work on a way home for you."

"No need. Princess Celestia is already on it."

"Princess Celestia?"

"Yeah, she and her sister sent me here, saying that they were doing me a favor."

"Hmm. I'll have to ask them why." She said, getting out a parchment and quill and writing a quick letter.

"Please do. I've never had marijuana before but I think I might need it to calm down." He said, sitting back and leaning his head backwards.

"Marijuana?"

"Don't ask." He said.

She stuffed the letter into a bag and put it on her back.

"Well, let's go to the boutique. I need Spike to send the letter."

"Alright, anything to get my mind off of his damn headache."


	4. Chapter 4

_Sorry for no updating in a while. Once you've been playing Battlefield 4 for half an hour, you can't fucking stop. Also, I might have raged at the fact that EVERY FUCKING TIME I DIE, THE KILLER IS USING AN ACE. MY SKILL WENT FROM 289 TO 193 IN ONE WEEKEND._

oooooooooo

**Chapter Four**

Walking through the streets wasn't as bad as he had thought. The locals didn't freak out at the sight of him, but instead only gave him confused glares and sometimes approached him curiously. This he thought was adorable. Even thought these ponies were about three and a half feet tall, and maybe taller than him if they were to stand on their hind legs, he thought they were just the cutest things ever. At least the mares. The stallions, or at least the big ones, were pretty scary.

He was sure that the weapons on his belt would make them scared, but they didn't even seem to know what they were, well, at least his gun. Twilight didn't ask questions about them, so he didn't mention them.

"We're almost there. It's just around this corner." Twilight said.

As she said, once they turned down the next road, there was a large, magnificent building. Zac thought it was a bit over the top decorwise, but it was a boutique in a world full of color and joy, sooo... Wait, why would ponies even wear dresses?

Twilight pushed the door open and the bell rang. He immediately noticed a white pony with a magnificent dark bluish mane working on a dress that was set up on a pony shaped mannequin. She looked up above her glasses, a single bead of sweat coming down the fur on her head and some strands of her mane out of place. Needless to say, she looked shocked. Her mouth dropped open and she gasped.

'_She does seem like the type to freak-_'

She suddenly rushed towards him, prompting him to back up a bit. She pushed him down on a chair that he didn't even see when he walked in, immediately trying to take his jacket off.

"Whoa! Whoa! What are you doing?"

"Darling, this garment has a large tear in it! I must make you a new one immediately!"

"What are you talking about? It's always had a-"

He looked at the side of the fleece jacket, and sure enough, there was a giant tear that went from his armpit halfway down to his waist.

"Oh."

"Here, I'll take this one, and I'll get your measurements. Come here, darling."

She ushered him towards a room that was separated from the other with a large red curtain. Twilight followed them in and he hesitated to take off the jacket.

"I'll take the jacket now." She said.

He grabbed it by the collar and pulled it off, keeping his green undershirt on.

"I'll take that one as well."

"No... It's fine. I would rather not."

"Why?" Twilight asked.

"It's... nothing. Just something that I think my family and I should only know about."

"Oh. Well, I will honor your privacy." Rarity said, bringing a tape measure over to him.

He held his arms out while she measured across from fingertip to fingertip. She measured every dimension of his chest and arms, jotting down the measurements on a notepad. After that was done, she went over to a sewing machine and went to work.

"Rarity, I got the fabric you wanted. It was buried behind all the other-"

Zac turned to look at a purple lizard in the opening of the curtains, carrying a bundle of fabric. They sat there staring at each other for a while.

"I swear, my head is about to explode." He said, leaning back in the chair, covering his eyes.

The reptilian creature went over to Twilight, hiding behind her.

"Uh, Twilight? What is that?" He said, pointing to Zac.

"Don't worry, he won't hurt you."

"No, but I might hurt myself." Zac said, interrupting her conversation with Spike.

"He's just confused about being in a new world."

"Confused would be putting it lightly." Zac interrupted yet again.

"Don't worry, Spike. He'll lighten up eventually."

"Eventually? How long do you think I'm gonna be here?"

"Honestly, I have no idea."

"How about we go to your princesses and I go right now. I highly doubt they were doing me a favor by sending me here. No offense."

"None taken." Twilight said.

"It's finished!" Rarity sang.

She turned around and revealed a long sleeved, dark red shirt. She brought it over to Zac, who she tapped on the leg to snap him out of his hands-over-his-eyes-and-leaning-back position. She held up the shirt with a smile. After a few seconds, he put both thumbs up and gave a stupid smile with his upper lip going down over his lower.

"Beautiful." He said.

"Well? Try it on."

He took off his scarf and put the shirt on, pushing the sleeves up to his elbows.

"Fits nice. Thanks."

"Oh, it was no trouble. Now that that's over, who are you?"

"I am Prince Zacoviaxé Jasidek Vaiébakaer."

"A prince?" Rarity and Twilight both asked.

"Yes. You may not believe it but it's true."

"I'm sorry, but you don't seem very much like a prince." Twilight said.

"I know. I've heard that from so many critics that I just want to fuggin shoot the next person that says it. Everyone always just says that I'll be a crappy leader for my country because apparently I am not taking royalty seriously, but they don't know anything. My father was just like me and he is one of the best rulers on the damn planet!... I'll make an exception with you because you just met me."

"Oh, sorry." Twilight said, calming down from Zac's little rabble.

"You're a... a... prince?" Rarity said, hyperventilating.

"Calm down, and please don't do the fainting cliché-"

Rarity fell to the ground, blacked out, but smiling.

"Dammit." Zac said under his breath.

"She usually does that in situations like this." Twilight said.

"This shit has happened before?"

"Please, watch your language, and not exactly. But any time that she is trusted with serving royalty or a celebrity, she loves it a little too much."

"She does seem like one to do that." Zac said.

"It is truly te cherry on top of her personality." Twilight joked.

Zac chuckled, wrapping his scarf around his neck again. He then bent down to Spike, who was still behind Twilight.

"So how about you, bud? What's your deal?"

"My deal? My deal is that you're some weird ape thing with fangs!"

"Spike! Don't be so rude!"

"Well, that's a shame, bud, 'cause I think dragons are amazing."

Spike stopped for a second.

"Dragons are seriously my favorite. Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to be friends with a dragon. My older brother and sister always laughed because dragons don't exist where I come from, and are only in stories."

"Really?" Spike said, coming closer.

"Heck yeah. Hey, can you breath fire?" Zac asked.

"I most certainly can." Spike said, now writhing in the attention Zac was giving him.

"Can I see it? Just a little flame."

Spike took a little inhale and a small bit of green flame shot from his mouth, disappearing in a second.

"Whoa, that's awesome!"

"Eh, if you're impressed by that, just wait to see what I can really do." He said.

"I can't wait." Zac said.

"Oh, Spike. Can you send this letter please?" Twilight said, taking out e letter.

Spike took it in his claw and burned up the letter with his fire breath.

"You can send letters with it too? That's awesome."

"And I can receive th- *BELCH*."

He burped up a letter when he wasn't expecting it.

"Heh heh. Cool."

Twilight picked up the letter and opened it.

"Twilight, after I infiltrated his mind to get the location of his home, I found many unsettling things. We thought it would be appropriate to send him to Ponyville so he could learn the true meaning of friendship."

"I guess she skipped all of the good parts of my memory." He said.

Twilight mumbled the rest of the letter.

"Sooo, they sent me here because apparently I am a heartless beast?" Zac asked.

"Well, it would seem so." Twilight said, tucking the letter into her bag.

Zac exhaled deeply, groaning loudly as he did so.

"So, I guess I'm going to be here for a while." He said, sitting back on a bench on the side of the room and leaning his head back.

"Hey, it's not so bad here. I'll make sure that you'll enjoy your stay, and learn the magic of friendship in the meantime." Twilight said with a smile.

"I can't wait." Zac groaned.

"Come on, we'll get you settled in." Twilight said, heading for the door.

Zac picked up Rarity and set her on the leather bench that he was just on. He then made his way to the door as well. As the bell rang, a soft voice caught Zac off guard.

"Oh, hello, Twilight. Is Rari- EEP!" The soft voice squealed, making Zac's already hurting knee buckle.

He fell backwards, hitting his head on the edge of the flower bed.

"Agh!"

He immediately put both of his hands on the area, where he swore he could feel his skull shifting. Luckily, it was just the concussion from earlier making him think so.

"Oh my! Are you okay? Did I scare you?"

He suddenly felt a hoof gently massaging his skull, which he was sure was in a thousand pieces by now.

"Here, let me see."

With his eyes still closed, he lifted his hand to show whoever this was the injured area.

"Oh my. It looks like the flower bed cut you pretty badly. Here, come to my house, we'll get you fixed up little guy."

With his newfound dizziness, he opened his eyes slowly, to find that he could only see out of one of his eyes. The other was hazy and dark.

"I... can barely see..."

"Oh, then it must be worse than I thought. Hurry now." The soft voice urged.

He followed the directions of this new pony who was leading him somewhere. He began to hear birds, insects, and other animals the farther they went. They went through a door, which was evident through the squeak of hinges. He could feel blood running down his wrist, so he pulled the sleeves of the new shirt to his elbows as not to ruin them.

"Here, just sit down right here. I'll be right back."

"Not to worry, Zac. Fluttershy is practically an expert." He heard Twilight's voice say.

"I just want my damn vision back. Rainbow Dash or whatever her name was kicked me a little too hard, and that fall didn't help."

"Rainbow Dash? She's coming back today." Twilight said.

"Yeah, well, she kicked me pretty hard."

"Why would she do that? And why were you at Wonderbolts Academy?"

"That's the first place I found myself in. I almost fell over the edge if the cliff. My bum leg saved me, though, when it caught on a root. But that didn't make it feel any better."

"What's wrong with your knee?"

"Uhhh. An accident I had playing soccer. Tore a ligament and dislocated my knee completely."

"Yikes. How bad did it hurt?"

"I don't remember. I passed out after I saw the damage."

"I could try to heal that if you want me to."

"Nah. But thanks."

Fluttershy came in with a white box with a red cross on it. Zac felt her hooves move his hand from the bleeding wound on his head.

"Wow, I can't believe how strong you are. If I had an injury like this, I would have passed out." Fluttershy said.

"Eh, I've had worse." Zac said, rubbing his chest.

He felt something moist rub the cut, making it sting a bit. After that, a bandage was wrapped tightly around his head, pishing his hair down in an uncomfortable way.

"There you are. Now, let's get your arms cleaned up."

She walked him outside. He was set on a small stool (at least that's what it felt like) and he heard a dunking sound. He felt a wet cloth lather his forearms, getting off the half dried blood.

"None of it got on the shirt, did it?" Zac asked.

"It got on the sleeves a bit, but there is an awful lot on the back." Fluttershy said.

Zac groaned.

"Gammit. Your friend Rarity made this for me. I don't want it to be ruined."

Suddenly, he heard Rarity's voice.

"Oh, darling, I'm sure I could get it out. I've worked on tougher stains."

"Sorry for bleeding all over it." Zac said, wincing as his head pounded.

"Well, accidents happen."

He was led back inside where he was set on the couch again.

"Just lay back and relax." Fluttershy said.

Zac turned his body around, keeping his feet dangling from the side of the couch. He felt a hoof press down on the couch next to his arm.

"Oh, I feel bad that you had to undergo so much injury so early." Rarity said.

Zac just moaned.

Zac heard the door open, and then a sing song voice practically right in his ear.

"Ooh, is this the guy I saw walking around with you girls a little bit ago?"

Zac just kept his eyes closed.

"Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! What's your name?"

"Pinkie, he isn't in great shape at the moment. I think it would be best to leave him alone for a bit until his head feels better." Twilight said.

"Yes, Pinkie, he hit his head and he isn't exactly sure what is happening." Rarity said.

"Oh, sorry. How's this?" She whispered in his ear.

Zac opened his eyes.

"Oh, he is listening! What's your name?" She said, still whispering.

"Zac."

"Huh. I guess that's a nice name."

"Thank you." Zac said, imitating her whisper.

Zac suddenly heard a monstrous belch.

"Oh, already?" Twilight's voice said.

'_How long was_ _Spike here?_'

"I find it quite a shame that Zac has sustained these injuries so early in his time in Equestria. Please make sure to give him the best care possible. Make sure everything is perfect. We wouldn't want him to think badly of Equestria, would we?" She read.

"What, does she think I'll declare war of my soup is too hot?" He asked.

"Well, we were going to at least try to make everything perfect. It isn't exactly easy to do that living in a town like this." Twilight said.

"There's nothing wrong with this town." Zac said.

"Well, aside from the occasional 'The fate of Equestria is in our hooves', it is pretty laid back." Twilight said.

"Say what?" Zac asked.

"It isn't important. What is important is that you enjoy your stay. I bet you're hungry."

"Hell yeah. I puked up my breakfast earlier. My stomach is eating itself."

"Well, let's go on off to Applejack's! It would only make sense that you eat some of Granny Smith's famous apple fritters as your first meal in Eauestria!" Pinkie Pie said in excitement, losing the whisper.

"Are you okay to walk?" Twilight asked, laying a hoof on his arm.

"Sure. We'll see if I get hit with something else in the head on the way and die."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

This must have been what it felt like to be drunk. Zac was desperately trying to keep his balance, and he had to stop every few minutes because even the light movement of walking was making his headache worse. When they finally reached Sweet Apple Acres, he leaned against the post of the gate, glad that his vision was slowly coming back.

"Well, here it is." Twilight said, out stretching a hoof and moving it across the vastness of the farmlands.

"I'm impressed. Must be one back-breaking job to harvest, though." Zac said.

"Oh it is."

As they walked up to the house, Zac heard pebbles and dust shuffle under his boots and the hooves of the ponies. He still had to squint in the sunlight, because his eyes still had to adjust to being able to see again. They stopped at the porch, and Zac waited with the rest of the gang just outside of view of the door. Twilight continued and opened the screen door to knock.

"Oh, how ya doin' Twilight? Applejack's in the farm if ya need 'er." An elderly female voice said.

"Thanks, Granny Smith."

They all walked over to the big red barn and into the small door that Zac had to duck to go into. Some shuffling was heard above him, and then a voice.

"Who's there?"

"Hey Applejack. We brought over a-"

Zac was looking up at the landing above when a heavy tool, one that he didn't have time to identify, was accidentally pushed off of the edge. It hit him in the top of the head, making a loud _ding_. The girls watched as he fell unconscious, going stiff and falling flat on his face.

ooooooooooo

"Big Mac, yer the only one that knows how to do it."

"Nope. Ah ain't gonna." Said a deep male voice.

"Ah know he's another male, but you could save his life!"

This was followed by a deep sigh.

"Fine."

Zac's eyes slowly blinked open as he felt something against his mouth. He felt his lungs fill with foreign air and he began scrambling all around on the floor, pushing this heavy mass away from him. The big red pony backed up immediately, wiping his lips with his hooves and spitting on the barn floor.

"Jark narhon falgyonu neit." Zac said, shuddering.

"Well, he is alive."

Zac looked around, his vision now almost fully restored even after that knockout blow. It seemed that he was unconscious long enough for his haziness to go away, but not the powerful headache. He noticed new ponies. One with an orange coat and a cowboy hat, a little one with a big bow, a big red stallion wearing a yolk, and an older, greenish one. They all had a mark on their flanks that had something to do with apples, except for the filly. Suddenly, something obstructed his view, and he already knew who it was.

"Rainbow Dash, I presume?" He asked.

"Yeah, that's me. You're the guy I knocked out earlier."

"Almost knocked out." He corrected.

"It's gonna take a little more than that to take me down."

"Like a gardening tool?" The one he presumed to be Applejack said.

"Exactly." He said, pointing to the cowpony.

"Are you saying that a hoe is better at fighting than me?" Rainbow Dash said, prompting a giggle from Zac.

"Not at all."

Rainbow Dash was getting closer and closer to him. Soon, their faces were only inches apart. Zac kept a straight, calm face.

"I'm simply saying that if you're going to attack me, finish the job. Don't wuss out after one hit."

"I DIDN'T WUSS OUT!"

Applejack stepped in between them, pushing them apart from each other before teeth were busted out.

"Now now, no fightin' after you two just met. Ah don't want a single drop of blood to be spilt on this farm, ya hear?"

"Got it." Zac said, getting up.

"Fine." Rainbow Dash grunted.

"Now, let's get some chow in ya. And no hoofsies under the table between you two." Applejack said, hooking her hooves around Zac and Rainbow's necks to bring them closer to her face.

"You got it, boss." Zac said, doing a two-finger salute.

They led him to the farm house where they arranged a couple of picnic tables so everyone could sit together.

"I'm goin' to get the grub started. Y'all git along." Granny Smith said, jittering and trembling all the way to the door.

The little filly with the bow followed her in. Rainbow Dash sat right across from Zac, glaring at him meanly. He just gave an evil smile back. The others, noticing this hostile stare down, got involved.

"Uh, Zac, what is it like back in your world?" Twilight asked.

"Compared to this world, very dull. I mean, everyone does the same thing over and over again expecting things to change one day. If that isn't the definition of insanity, I don't know what is. Adrenaline junkies like myself break away from that boringness and go out to do stuff. Fun stuff."

"Fun? Like what kind of fun?" Pinkie asked.

"Well, me? I love sports. It's practically all I think about doing. Snowboarding, soccer, that kind of stuff. I wish I could still play..."

"Why can't you play anymore?" Fluttershy asked.

"My knee, and several other injuries."

"What kind of injuries?" Applejack asked.

"Well, my knee was completely dislocated after a kid slipped in the mud when he was running after me and his shin collided with my knee. It was broken in three places and a there was also ligament damage."

The ponies around the tables cringed listening to this story.

"Yeah. It was pretty gross looking at the x-rays."

"I'd imagine." Twilight said.

"Where ya good at the sports ya played?" Applejack asked.

"Well, I was only the goalkeeper when I was playing soccer, so I never had a chance to score. I was a pretty decent goalie, though."

"Really? I bet if we had a goalie competition, I would totally beat-"

Zac hushed her with a hand right in front of her face.

"I tried a lot of other sports, but I found soccer to be the most fun."

"How are the people in your world? Are they nice?" Twilight asked.

"Well, it depends. Everyone in my world is different. Unfortunately, most of my species are a bunch of selfish bastards, always fighting when there is a little disagreement and killing any who oppose their way of thinking."

"Killing? Oh gosh. Couldn't you get them to stop?" Fluttershy asked.

"There is no way to stop it. Peace is nonexistent in my world. The only way to get them to stop is to get rid of them completely. But me? I'd rather sit back and watch as they kill each other. Sure, my country will assist our friends, but we don't intervene in a war that doesn't do us any harm."

"Wow, your world sucks." Rainbow Dash said.

"It does."

After a long, awkward silence, Twilight spoke.

"Let's steer away from this subject." Twilight said.

"Good idea. I'd rather not talk about it anyway." Zac said.

"So, you said you are royalty. Do you control your nation?" Twilight asked.

"Nope. That's my dad's job. My brother is the next in line."

"How many siblings do you have?" Rarity asked, pulling a piece of hay from her mane.

"A younger brother and sister, and an older brother and sister."

"What are they like?" Rarity continued.

"Well, my lil' brother Bryan is a musical genius, making awesome electronic music and such. My lil' sister Valeri is just as much a musical genius as Bryan. Those two often collaborate to make a mix between electronical and classical music."

"Classical? What does your sister play?" Twilight asked.

"She play's the violin and the cello. They're both nice kids, and smart too. My older brother is a giant. He's almost seven feet tall and muscular as hell. I swear he is too big to be human. He's pretty boring, not talking much, just occasionally going out to do some activities with us every once in a while. The rest of the time he is just getting lessons on how to be a great leader from my father and that kind of stuff."

"Well, he is a good brother isn't he?" Fluttershy asked.

"Does he not like parties? That's a bummer..." Pinkie said.

"Heh heh. Nah. He's pretty fun once he gets his adrenaline going. My older sister, Scylla, is a bookworm like my younger sister. She wants to be a nurse. She does about as much fun stuff as Dak. All in all, they're awesome in their own ways."

"What of your mother and father?"

"I'll tell their story later. It's kind of long."

"Oh, but I want to hear about them now! I bet their awesome just like your brothers and sisters!" Pinkie exclaimed, hopping up and down.

"Settle down, Pinkie. He said he would tell it later." Twilight said.

"Oh, sorry. Hey! What is that on your back?" Pinkie said, pulling his shirt collar down to get a better view of the-

"Nothing that should concern you." Zac said, pulling on the shirt to cover his neck.

"Yes, Pinkie. He said that it was something private at the boutique." Rarity informed.

"Like, what kind of private? Like, personal secrets private or-"

"No, it's just..."

"Oh! So it's some kind of giant scar from a dark day in your life and every time you look at it that day haunts your mind?"

"Pinkie! Stop! Yer makin' 'im feel insecure." Applejack said.

Applejack walked over and pat Zac on the back.

"Don't worry, partner. We wouldn't judge ya if we saw it." She said.

"I know. Y'all are good people, but still."

"We can stop talking about it if you'd like, Zac." Twilight said.

"Please."

"Alright, let's change the subject yet again. How about we talk about ourselves for Zac?" Twilight suggested.

"Ooh! You know my name already, but just in case you forgot already, I'm Pinkie Pie! I love parties! I love love love them! I have a big family on a rock farm far away from Ponyville and I know everypony in Ponyville!" Pinkie shouted right in Zac's face.

"Alright... Well, I'll keep it short and sweet. I study magic, enjoy books, and I have a family in Canterlot where my brother is captain of the royal guard." Twilight said.

"Ah, cool." Zac said.

He turned to Applejack.

"Ah'm Applejack, iffin' ya didn't know already. Ah live on this here farm and we sell apples and apple products. This is mah brother, Big Macintosh. You two met earlier, if ah remember correctly. Granny Smith just went in the house with Applebloom, mah little sis."

"Eeyup." Big Mac said in confirmation.

"Nice to meet ya, Applejack and Big Mac."

Rarity went next.

"Well, I have a little sister as well, back at the boutique, Sweetie Belle. I do have quite a niche for fashion, and I am well into proper etiquette if you haven't noticed already. I look forward to making new clothing for you in the future!"

"Uh huh. It's a pleasure." Zac said.

Before he could move, Rainbow Dash was in front of him.

"I'm the most radical, fastest, and coolest pony in Ponyville! Just this morning I helped the construction workers with some heavy lifting. Now tell me what you have done today." She said, trying to intimidate Zac by getting close.

Zac just chuckled.

"Why are you laughing?" She demanded.

"It's kind of hard to feel intimidated by someone who is as brightly colored as you. I mean what are you, a gay marriage parade float?"

"You shut up!" She shouted.

She tried to throw a punch in his direction but he just ducked and she flew forwards with her own momentum. She face planted on the ground and Zac laughed.

"Failure!" He said.

"Shut up!" She said again.

After he stopped laughing, he looked down at her as she wiped dirt from her face. She looked up at him and growled. Her nose let out a small trickle of blood.

"You brought that upon yourself. I don't know why you're giving me stink eye." Zac said.

He took off his scarf and tossed it to her.

"Your nose is bleeding." He pointed out.

She threw his scarf back in a ball.

"I don't care!" She said, sitting down in a huff.

Zac looked at the others. They seemed to be holding back their laughter from Rainbow's ongoing failure at intimidating Zac. Rainbow let the blood trickle down onto the wooden table, an angry look on her face.

"Trying to be a tough girl?" Zac asked.

"I am tough. Tougher than you."

"Alright, whatever. Just wipe up the blood before the kid sees it. When is the food coming out?"

"Right now!" Granny Smith said from the door.

She came down with a platter of pies on her back. The filly also came down with a few pies balanced on her head and back.

"Ow. Ow. Granny? Can ya get these pies offa me? They're real hot!" Applebloom said.

Granny Smith was still setting the pies down, so Zac leaned over and took the pies from the filly. He set them down fast on the table, flapping his fingers in the air to cool them down.

"Trust me, partner, Granny's apple pie will make that headache go away lickety split." Applejack said.

"I hope so." Zac said.

Granny Smith and Applebloom passed slices of pie down the conjoined tables, and everypony dug in as soon as they received their slice.

oooooooooo

_Sorry for the shitty chapter. Anyone wanna play Battlefield with me? I'm bored as shit. My tag on Xbox 360 is my username on this site. I won't be an ass, I promise. Send me a party invite whenever (preferably soon because I want to actually talk to some of you guys *insert forever alone face*) because I'm probably gonna be on Xbox all day. But first, PM me your tag._


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